Wednesday, 24 March 2010

Discovering Elements!

Its been 10 whole days since I last posted anything on my blog! A welcome break considering the pace at which I was posting in the last 2 months. Nevertheless, the break provided me with time to think about my next post(which is this one). I also imagined working on a few topics- Many things have happened in these 10 days. There was the Regatta- which I think was not as good as the last two. Two of my very good friends got exceptional achievements- Prachi got the Best Outgoing Oarsperson Award, while Siddhi keeps showing that sky is her lower limit- an admit from Stanford one day, and the Best Outgoing Sportsperson at the college on the next. Then there is this subtle metamorphosis in the nature around. All of a sudden there is a sudden bloom of flowers of vivid eye catching colours all around. So certainly there was plenty to think. I did think on these subjects, and just as I was going to write on one, an oddball stuck out. You see, its such events, which really gets you into the laughing mode.

Well, as a CoEPian, we are used to fantastic accomplishments and discoveries on a daily basis. Many new things are discovered by the students everyday.This time it was one of our brilliant professors who has made an astonishing discovery. Certainly, CoEP Materials Science and Chemistry department, if ever such existed, would have been proud, and would certainly have sent the IUPAC scrambling for cover . Why? Simple-  We have discovered an astonishing new element. Although current studies are theoretical, all evidences point to the actual existence of this unique element. If ever synthesized, this element would be the heaviest and the densest in the world. The proof? A rectangular block of this element measuring 35mm x 35mm x 2.5 mm measured an astonishing 20 kg! this makes its density 6.53x10^6 g/cc. Possibly only a white dwarf, a  neutron star and a black hole will outweigh this newest element. 

Logic defines that this element is highly hazardous, and has to be operated with a utmost safety of robotic arm. It is extremely brittle and exhibits all properties of glass. On slightest heating, it shreds into a thousand pieces and sends its shards hurtling everywhere. So, human interaction is to be kept to a minimum. To do this job, the Department of Mechanical Engineering was contacted, and some of us students, doing a secret training course in the department were given the job of designing two suction cups whose contact force is 65 kg(?) this gives a net upward acceleration of 110g- which will make the system break the Mach speeds in a few yards!!  i have till not not heard of anything in existance which is able to sustain this much force! but with the superb and highly insightful guidance of our honourable faculty, anyway, design it we did, and from standard formulae, we got astonishing results- the diameter of individual suction cup is nearly twice the dimensions of the given slab! god knows how we will be able to lift it!

Till now, we have not been able to determine the atomic number nor the atomic mass of this fascinating element. Whatever calculations we are doing are coming to a dead end. All we can conclude is that it is 3 million times more dense than the densest material available- Osmium. I am wondering if a tonne of this substance will generate enough gravitational pull to attract and suck its inventor into it- and if possible annihilate him.If it should, then I shall personally create the required amount of substance, even though it puts my neck at a risk!

There were several nominees that were considered while naming this element- Kutroniyum, Jadonium, Poloamintwiththeholonium, assonium, and many more. But after much debate and controversy, it has been decided that the element will be named after a visionary in CoEP Mechanical. A man whose genius surpasses that of one and all. A man who played a key role in its invention. Yes- you have guessed it right, we have named it Ohonium!! (Anant calls it O!Holium whereas Rao calls it O'Holium)


  1. hahahaaha!!!!today,rao was bothered about the diameter for such a long time...
    u have narrated the incident very well...and hilariously!...and now i know why u referred to him as 'O'hol' in the morning!!!

  2. thanks neha!
    Are you sure rao was bothered about the diameter? you should have seen him take the micky out of the system while writing it!